Having to deal with depression and anxiety on your own is…life-changing.
Not the enlightening life-changing, not at first. Where you feel in your bones the positive impact said changes are going to have in your life.
It’s the scary life-changing, where all of a sudden you don’t recognize yourself because you’re not functioning normally. You’re not alright for way too long of a time and it makes you nervous. You start thinking, “Will I ever be alright?”
You start to fear that the future you’ve been looking forward to is now changing before your eyes. And you feel helpless about it.
It’s that scary.
Depression and anxiety are hard to deal with by themselves, but once merged, they become a different beast entirely. Medication isn’t always an option for everyone. Personally speaking, I was way too young and uneducated about medication when the time arose for me to get help. I grew up in a household where medication had a negative connotation, and it simply wasn’t an option to be considered seriously.
But there are other ways you can help yourself, and ways your support system can help you. You’re not helpless, you just need some guidance and more options.
Here’s how you can deal with depression and anxiety without medication.
Hit Your BACE
This is a cognitive behavioral therapy technique that actually works well for depression and anxiety. BACE stands for:
- B: Body Movement
- A: Achieve
- C: Connect
- E: Enjoy
Striving to accomplish at least one of each category every day is a great way to keep your mind moving forward. This makes dealing with depression and anxiety more manageable because you have small, achievable goals that tend to your overall well-being. And honestly? It keeps your mind off your symptoms.
Let Your Emotions Come And Go
When dealing with depression and anxiety, those intrusive thoughts love to dwell. The anxiety keeps those depressive thoughts at the forefront of your mind and makes them ugly.
It sucks, but the best way to combat these thoughts is to let them come up and watch them pass. They never go willingly, so giving it a nudge is usually recommended. Writing them out works well because you can turn the page and visibly see them disappear. And that’s a start.
Yes, it’s going to rattle you.
Yes, you’ll feel vulnerable and…a bunch of other terrible things. And if they leave you shaky, let a loved one know. Get it out of you. If you feel you’re being annoying by speaking these thoughts out loud, then you really need to tell someone. Don’t let this warped narrative fester for you to deal with alone.
Dedicate Time To Face Yourself
It’s normal to continue on with your days finding relief from the symptoms of your depression and anxiety. That usually looks like relying on your distractions. And while I believe it’s great to get a breather from your symptoms, it’s not healthy to go days without facing yourself.
You have to know how to deal with your depression and anxiety. The best way to do that is with some firsthand experience; you’ve gotta get in there and do some repairing. So I highly recommend dedicating time to approach your anxious and depressive thoughts.
Adopt a wonder when you meet yourself. Ask yourself why, and then how?
Why am I feeling this way?
How else can I react to these thoughts in a way that helps me?
What actually helps me?
How can I do these things more?
Have a conversation with yourself. And if you’re stuck finding answers for yourself, make note of it and move on.
And for the love of all that’s holy, be freaking nice about it.
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Let Someone You Trust Know About Scary Thoughts
When depressive thoughts get scary, it feels like you’re in a pit in the ground, and it’s getting deeper and deeper until it’s suffocating.
You are not meant to deal with scary thoughts alone. It’s simply too hard to keep a clear and level head when you’re in a state like this.
If at any point when practicing the options listed here you have a hard time thinking clearly and you’re scatterbrained or your symptoms get worse, you need someone else to step in and interfere.
And that’s okay. It’s scary, but it’s okay. Everyone needs help with everything. The smallest of inconveniences, major life events, and decisions, so many decisions. This is something I had to remind myself when I needed to get help.
You are not failing yourself when you seek out help. You’re quite literally saving yourself.
Cry When It Gets Overwhelming
It’s easy to get tough about your mental illnesses. I’m guilty of doing this – of shouldering my symptoms with a bruteness, an impatience.
After dealing with your depression and anxiety for so many years, you brush your symptoms off like they’re annoying family members coming home for the holidays. It’s too familiar.
But being overwhelmed by your mental illness to the point where you constantly shut down shouldn’t be your norm. When thoughts get scary and draining emotions override your joy, cry it out with a loved one.
Maybe only a few tears spillover. Maybe your chest gets tight and you can’t breathe through your sobbing. Allow it. Your body needs to release the stress this depression-anxiety combo gives you. Allow it. And do it in a safe space with support.
I don’t mean unloading on someone who isn’t prepared to hear it (though sometimes the tears just spill out unannounced – it happens). I mean being in a comfortable, safe space to release that stress with someone you trust. Honestly, having someone wipe your tears and reinforce their support for you after a good cry is on a whole other level of care. Way better than doing it alone.
People don’t cry enough, especially men. You need to cry. I’ll admit this has now become a personal letter to too many of my loved ones, but I hope you understand how important I believe this is, especially when you don’t have tools like therapy and medication at your disposal.
This was how to deal with depression and anxiety without medication. It’s not an easy thing to do, which is why these steps aren’t quick and easy. But they help.
I hope if you do get access to medication, you have an open conversation with a professional about this option. But until then, you’ve got this. Once you feel confident in the coping strategies you cultivate, that’s when the good stuff happens – the enlightening life-changing.
Until next time.